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Writer's pictureKaren Stabile

Is normalizing confusion on your calendar?


What seemed to have order and direction...turned into utter chaos. What in the world have I just done?

It’s usually a result of things that are different and not really belonging together…entering the picture. They slip in to trip you up. No one invited them. You find yourself doing things that have nothing to do with your original plan. What was consistent vanished...

It happens to the best as well as beginning leaders. Remedy to divert the unexpected...pull back those blinds…rent those curtains. Light is your salvation…curtains are overrated.

“A good thing can be made its own enemy, by being either confused, or taken out of its true meaning.” T. Austin-Sparks

When I think about life, I've made some radical changes. As good as I knew they would be for me, there were days when my focus went to my unsettledness.

Even in a good thing, confusion is a factor, whether we like it or not. Any time we decide to make changes and move forward…it has a way of showing up.

It accompanies change…and then keeps coming back in different forms to hamper our attention. No, it’s not time to throw the towel in…it’s time to let people see more of who you really are and what you stand for.

You know every good advancement intended for growth and development…will be accompanied with opposition that wants to bring you down. Growth doesn't happen without pain in your mind.

How to rent those curtains?

  • Go back to your original plan and intention. What was the goal or plan for the situation or relationship? Remember why you were first inspired…

  • Consider the picture that you see now, even with all the ugliness that has entered, “Where did things get off track?”

  • If people are involved, adding to the distorted view ask, “What might be behind the reason for their attitudes and behavior around ______?”

  • Invite those who know you well and trust, to give their observation of the matter. Listen without interrupting.

  • Look at the matter from Ariel view. Take it up 30,000 feet…does the confusion look as large from up there? Or maybe not so bad as you think?

Now that you can see…what can you do to help the situation? Stop the confusion? Focusing on the things that trip you up and bring us down…We don’t deny they exist. We want to see them only for how big they are, not for how big they seem in our mind.

Bringing our focus back time and time again... to what our purpose is. Our vision helps settle the confusion. We'll find ourselves saying, “Oh you again…I know exactly what to do with you!”

How do you settle the unsettledness in your life and quiet confusion when it shows up at your door?


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