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  • Writer's pictureKaren Stabile

Want to trump those insecurities?

In some respects life is still much of a mystery. There is much we haven’t figured out. Some things want to take us down and hold us back…if we let them. Most of us have seen this in action and experienced the down side of life a time or two.

It’s the not knowing…what is around the corner, the open

ended future, that shakes us till our bones rattle. Will it always be this way? Life's full of changes...

Insecurities set in and hovers over us, causing us to question everything…reliving the past over and over again. Most of the time focusing on the negative.

It’s that exact feeling, I had in first grade.

Sitting at my desk, feeling overwhelmed by the pile of papers, that I needed to complete by lunch. I on the other hand, thought I wanted them done by morning recess. Life was off and running as an Achiever.

I remember fixing my eyes on the cardboard name tag at the top of my desk. Running my finger over each letter, tracing my name. Wondering and trying to figure out how in the world was I going to get all this work done? Then I'd daydream, another early hobby. Drifting off looking out at the great big world, I just knew I was a part of.

Another part of me really wanted to talk to the new kids sitting on each side of me. I was sure we’d become good friends. I felt it was my mission to make it happen. I knew it would motivate me to crank out those worksheets, if we could just talk a little.

All of it seems so clear, looking back on it now. If I knew then, these quirks were talent, I would have been so much more secure and confident everything would be alright. It would all work out.

Yet, then I was trapped in a state of insecurity because I was:

· in a new environment surrounded by new people that I wasn’t permitted to talk to

· expected to learn and do a lot of new things in a short period of time, not in the order I wanted to do them

· not able to randomly play when I wanted to

· needing to follow new rules, needing to be sure I knew the new rules by heart

· unable to give my opinion whenever I thought I should, I had so much to share

Maybe you’ve felt this way at some point in your life?

We seem to want to relive the past. Hashing it out in our minds all the mistakes we have made, all the choices made landing us smack dab in the middle of nowhere.

At least that’s the way it seems sometime. It doesn’t matter if the change is a career change, position change, or even a personal development change.

You could be tired of pleasing everyone around you. You want to be more of who you really are.

“You cannot infer excellence from studying failure and then inverting it.”

Marcus Buckingham & Curt Coffman, FIRST, Break all the Rules

In our minds we believe if we figure out where we have gone off our well-intended path, we can make adjustments. Maybe just do the opposite of what we did in the first place? Fix what we did wrong, in all the areas where we tend to continually come up short and life will be better.

Reflection is good and an ample amount for examination is important. Continually looking over our shoulder, will result in a stiff neck. We need to look at what we have worked through and come out on top. Then eyes straight what the future holds.

Figure out what we have to work with and are really good at. What we want to do…what excellence in life looks like for us.

Over 17,000,000 people around the world, have experienced the benefit of learning their talent areas through the Clifton Strengths assessment.

I’m turning more and more to this tool to help individuals transition and make the changes they desire.

It is a galvanized bridges connecting individuals to their brilliance…

The above bullet points, seemed as though they wanted to take me down in the first grade. That part of my insecurities is being silenced more and more, as a result of knowing the value of using and owning my strengths.

I just can’t help believe that as I sat in first grade, if I had a little more coaching around Relator, Achiever, Responsibility, Connectedness, and Learner (my greatest talent areas) wouldn't have seemed quite so challenging.

Have you taken the assessment yet? You can through the following link.

It will help you with the changes you face. Increasing self-awarness to silence the insecurities wanting to keep you from moving successfuly into the next phase of life, where you are influencing, as though you've never influenced before. Doing the things your were destined to do close to excellence.

Contact me for a Free 30 minute Get Acquainted Call to see what coaching options are available.

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